Tombstone Shadow of chronic Insomnia'
July 3rd Tuesday (Tombstone Shadow of chronic Insomnia)
I am gonna break a few rules today...keepin the spirit here are some
you should probably ...Ahem; keep in mind
dont tell abt ur views or policy/beliefs in life...to anyone...
for eg: if u dont hit on friends...dont tell that to ur friends...
coz..if u end of having a softcorner for then..u have to give it a
painful..secret burial :(
trust me...u will feel miserable..rest of ur life !!!!
Don't post unless you're sure you won't get your foot caught in your mouth(rule broken)
To guyz, never share an embarrasing secret with a girl, the next day probably most of the girls will be smiling at u (of course u know what the smile means).(rule broken)
NEVER EVER FALL IN YOUR OWN EYES, IT SCARS YOU FOR LIFE (NEVER ..HAA)
Have the courage to admit to your mistakes and learn from them
Always have a Plan B (contingency).
never 'regret' what u ve done......tis no use (try not usin the 'regret' as a word )
when you are not in your senses...
shut the fuck up !!!! coz you ll end gettin high at hostel90(dis ones for u MD) typin this shit!!
f u have been drivin while talkin on ur phone...
or talkin on ur phone while drivin -- remember two things -->
(1) dont drop the phone on the car floor when u see a police guy starin at u -- especially if the police guy deciedes to speak to u for sometime ---the bloody call costs u a lott! rather cut the call immedeatly!
(2) DO NOT .. i repeat DO NOT try to Sms ur friends while drivin ! THAT IS INSANE!
dont ever assume that people know what you are talking about.
Do not ever stretch with your boss's joke on himself and his style of work....While its very tempting to pitch in something there, it might eventually be a very bad career move
if u love to rebel be prepared for sm opposition as well
When "borrowing petrol " from someone's bike, make sure a plastic cup isn't used. It melts away as soon as the liquid gets into it.
NEVER EVER give a "constructive feedback" to your commitee head even if
asked for. They tend to ask for it, but they don't expect you to teach em' how to manage.(Oops the Head/ thats me!)
When someone asks you (esp when ur in Malluland) if you remember/know him/her, NEVER EVER say 'Yes'! Esp when u don't know the person! You'll be asked to draw the family tree on the spot.. and you'll be caught trying to figure out if the dude's a second cousin twice removed on the father's maternal uncle's wife's sister in-law's side or something equally iffy! [Note to myself: Follow ur own advice dummy!]
never attempt the mammoth task of clearin up ur own studytable esply if u've not been to ur studytable in the past 5 months or so...
SEEK HELP......elder sis r good at it.ask 'em to do it for u or else u'll end up with all the mess all over the place.
Never smoke weed in a room having a laptop wired to the internet.You might mail yourself classic shit or even worse,mail your crushes theories on why you got crushed*.
* which,in a way is not so bad.
Vodka and redbull, keeps you in an amazing HIGH.
doesn't let you pass out and gives you all the energy to dance non stop
for over 8 hrs....
another one from the books of the wise yet ingorant...
never lick an ice cube...can be very painful
hances are, when u're totally prepared, the exam turns out to be a damp squib of a pathetic excuse of a paper..
Five things I learnt from a Tamil flick
1. After your husband abuses you, sleeps around, demands for a divorce,tries to kill you and your child, … you must still cling on to your‘thali’. Because that is your life (!!!??!!).
2. If you are an outlaw who is on his way to surrender to the police, expect to see half the nation’s police force trooping behind you for an hour, march-past fashion, with guns pointed at ya…
3. If you are good looking and have a babe and are in short a ‘hero’,you can get away with murdering 3 dozen goons
4. If you haven’t united with your lady love before the film ends, rest assured that even 6 bullets emptied into your chest will not kill ya.
What’s more, you be still be able to run behind a speeding train and join her, blood, gore ‘n all not withstanding
5. Always keep half-a-picture of your mom in your girlfriend’s refrigerator (yea, I mean IN). You never know... what if her friend(who opens the fridge) turns out to be your long lost sister?
Lesson no 166:
Never try to electrolyze water with 220V a.c.
Produces an entertaining display of fireworks and a blown fuse.
And you don't end up advancing the frontiers of science.
for all those who work over the internet...never provide your client with the information or resources until you get the complete payment upfront, no matter what they say...chances are they are a cheating lying rat fink who doesn't deserve to even breathe carbondioxide let
alone oxygen.
'Never ever fight with the guy who's cooking your food'
You may be a doctor or an engineer, or a bloody banyan tree, but if it's in your destiny to work when you're supposed to be sleeping, then so it will be.
Qoute "
.you can unlock your car long distance via mobileIf you forget your car keys inside,use your mobile to call up someone who has a duplicate set .Stand real close to your car,ask them to click
on the unlock button....voila!open sesame!" end Qoute
After readin that please dont fuckin think say something like this
{
Its difficult to understand... how can you transmit radio frequencies
over cell phones, it doesn't make sense. The frequency the cell phones
use is roughly the same as the one that the remote locking device uses.
There's no way you can modulate a wave and successfully transmit it
when it has almost the same frequency as the carrier.does it have
anyhing to do wid ultrasonic fequencies.
}
Dont show off ur electronic gyan,its a chain letter u moron..
(thats me .. heh!!)
Thou not leave any space between your car and divider if you are in the rightmost lane and struck in a traffic jam.You give the guys on Bikes and bicycles, the slightest glimpse of hope
to get through that space, you might end up with scratches on the right side and a broken rear view mirror.
why did the loonie throw the butter from the top floor?
'cos he wanted to see the butterfly
srry had to sneak that in...lol..continuin alon the same lines
A SARDAR comes running to the doctor shouting and Screaming in pain "
Please doctor, you've got to help me. I've been stung by a bee."
DOCTOR: " Don't worry; I'll put some cream on it."
SARDAR: " You will never find that bee. It must be miles away by now."
DOCTOR: " No, you don't understand! I'll put some Cream on the place you were stung."
SARDAR: " Oh! It happened in the garden where I was Sitting under a tree."'
DOCTOR (in anger): " No, no, you IDIOT! I mean on which part of your body did that bee sting."
SARDAR (still screaming in pain): " On my finger! The bee stung me on my finger and it really hurts."
DOCTOR (banging his fist, abusing and shouting):" Which one?"
SARDAR (innocently): " How am I to know? All bees look the same to me.
Q) Which is the only word in english with 4 Ts and 1 G ???
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Ans: Originality (Oru G, Naal T)
Thats mallu for uall
/// if u didnt get it.. good!
what is the opposite of nagpanchami?
ans: nag did not punch me
what is the inverse of nagpanchami?
ans: i punched the nag
This ones GOOD >>>
Q: when papa elephant died, he was buried under the orange tree, why?
A: 'cos he loved oranges
Q: when mama elephant died, she was buried under the orange tree, why?
A: 'cos she loved papa elephant
Q: when brother elephant died, he was also buried under the orange
tree, why?
A: 'cos it was a family tradition
Q: when sister elephent died, she wasn't buried under the orange tree,
why?
A: how many elephants can you bury under an orange tree, huh?
And then Again....
he the genie said,
'OK. You released me from the lamp, blah, blah, blah. This is the
fourth time this month and I'm getting a little sick of these wishes,
so you can forget about three. You only get one wish.'
The man sat and thought about it for a while and said,
'I've always wanted to go to Hawaii but I'm scared to fly and I get very seasick. Could you build me a bridge to Hawaii so I can drive over there to visit?'
The genie laughed and said, 'That's impossible. Think of the logistics
of that! How would the supports ever reach the bottom of the Pacific?
Think of how much concrete... how much steel! No, think of another wish.'
The man said OK and tried to think of a really good wish. Finally, he
said,
'I've been married and divorced four times. My wives always said that I
don't care and that I'm insensitive. So, I wish that I could understand
women... know how they feel inside and what they're thinking when they
give me the silent treatment... know why they're crying, know what they
really want when they say "nothing"... know how to make them truly
happy. .'
The genie said,
'You want that bridge two lanes or four?'
sardar to girl:i love you
girl to sardar:im sorry im a lesbian!
sardar :but wats a "lesbian"
girl:it means i love to have sex only with girls!
sardar: oh even im a lesbian!
And finally
All men are created equal, even superman has to wear his pants one leg at a time...
But then some are more equal than others, superman wears his briefs
over his pants and still manages to look cool ...doesnt mean u can pull
sumtin like that off so....
cheers yall..... I ll be back for all u Pro-lifers hu didnt get that connection between Rajni and drugs....even better so.. watch put for the positive LSD story comin soon... Over and out
(Note :All views expressed here are probably udaod....
.... Q1)"Ananth are you high?" ..ur guess is as good as mine..
Q2)"Menon are you serious ...or jus satire" Ans: jus Satire)
Archives on the blog if u don know the link ...u probably shudnt read
it..mail me)
GOD Bless Amayeerikya..happy independence day in advance
I am gonna break a few rules today...keepin the spirit here are some
you should probably ...Ahem; keep in mind
dont tell abt ur views or policy/beliefs in life...to anyone...
for eg: if u dont hit on friends...dont tell that to ur friends...
coz..if u end of having a softcorner for then..u have to give it a
painful..secret burial :(
trust me...u will feel miserable..rest of ur life !!!!
Don't post unless you're sure you won't get your foot caught in your mouth(rule broken)
To guyz, never share an embarrasing secret with a girl, the next day probably most of the girls will be smiling at u (of course u know what the smile means).(rule broken)
NEVER EVER FALL IN YOUR OWN EYES, IT SCARS YOU FOR LIFE (NEVER ..HAA)
Have the courage to admit to your mistakes and learn from them
Always have a Plan B (contingency).
never 'regret' what u ve done......tis no use (try not usin the 'regret' as a word )
when you are not in your senses...
shut the fuck up !!!! coz you ll end gettin high at hostel90(dis ones for u MD) typin this shit!!
f u have been drivin while talkin on ur phone...
or talkin on ur phone while drivin -- remember two things -->
(1) dont drop the phone on the car floor when u see a police guy starin at u -- especially if the police guy deciedes to speak to u for sometime ---the bloody call costs u a lott! rather cut the call immedeatly!
(2) DO NOT .. i repeat DO NOT try to Sms ur friends while drivin ! THAT IS INSANE!
dont ever assume that people know what you are talking about.
Do not ever stretch with your boss's joke on himself and his style of work....While its very tempting to pitch in something there, it might eventually be a very bad career move
if u love to rebel be prepared for sm opposition as well
When "borrowing petrol " from someone's bike, make sure a plastic cup isn't used. It melts away as soon as the liquid gets into it.
NEVER EVER give a "constructive feedback" to your commitee head even if
asked for. They tend to ask for it, but they don't expect you to teach em' how to manage.(Oops the Head/ thats me!)
When someone asks you (esp when ur in Malluland) if you remember/know him/her, NEVER EVER say 'Yes'! Esp when u don't know the person! You'll be asked to draw the family tree on the spot.. and you'll be caught trying to figure out if the dude's a second cousin twice removed on the father's maternal uncle's wife's sister in-law's side or something equally iffy! [Note to myself: Follow ur own advice dummy!]
never attempt the mammoth task of clearin up ur own studytable esply if u've not been to ur studytable in the past 5 months or so...
SEEK HELP......elder sis r good at it.ask 'em to do it for u or else u'll end up with all the mess all over the place.
Never smoke weed in a room having a laptop wired to the internet.You might mail yourself classic shit or even worse,mail your crushes theories on why you got crushed*.
* which,in a way is not so bad.
Vodka and redbull, keeps you in an amazing HIGH.
doesn't let you pass out and gives you all the energy to dance non stop
for over 8 hrs....
another one from the books of the wise yet ingorant...
never lick an ice cube...can be very painful
hances are, when u're totally prepared, the exam turns out to be a damp squib of a pathetic excuse of a paper..
Five things I learnt from a Tamil flick
1. After your husband abuses you, sleeps around, demands for a divorce,tries to kill you and your child, … you must still cling on to your‘thali’. Because that is your life (!!!??!!).
2. If you are an outlaw who is on his way to surrender to the police, expect to see half the nation’s police force trooping behind you for an hour, march-past fashion, with guns pointed at ya…
3. If you are good looking and have a babe and are in short a ‘hero’,you can get away with murdering 3 dozen goons
4. If you haven’t united with your lady love before the film ends, rest assured that even 6 bullets emptied into your chest will not kill ya.
What’s more, you be still be able to run behind a speeding train and join her, blood, gore ‘n all not withstanding
5. Always keep half-a-picture of your mom in your girlfriend’s refrigerator (yea, I mean IN). You never know... what if her friend(who opens the fridge) turns out to be your long lost sister?
Lesson no 166:
Never try to electrolyze water with 220V a.c.
Produces an entertaining display of fireworks and a blown fuse.
And you don't end up advancing the frontiers of science.
for all those who work over the internet...never provide your client with the information or resources until you get the complete payment upfront, no matter what they say...chances are they are a cheating lying rat fink who doesn't deserve to even breathe carbondioxide let
alone oxygen.
'Never ever fight with the guy who's cooking your food'
You may be a doctor or an engineer, or a bloody banyan tree, but if it's in your destiny to work when you're supposed to be sleeping, then so it will be.
Qoute "
.you can unlock your car long distance via mobileIf you forget your car keys inside,use your mobile to call up someone who has a duplicate set .Stand real close to your car,ask them to click
on the unlock button....voila!open sesame!" end Qoute
After readin that please dont fuckin think say something like this
{
Its difficult to understand... how can you transmit radio frequencies
over cell phones, it doesn't make sense. The frequency the cell phones
use is roughly the same as the one that the remote locking device uses.
There's no way you can modulate a wave and successfully transmit it
when it has almost the same frequency as the carrier.does it have
anyhing to do wid ultrasonic fequencies.
}
Dont show off ur electronic gyan,its a chain letter u moron..
(thats me .. heh!!)
Thou not leave any space between your car and divider if you are in the rightmost lane and struck in a traffic jam.You give the guys on Bikes and bicycles, the slightest glimpse of hope
to get through that space, you might end up with scratches on the right side and a broken rear view mirror.
why did the loonie throw the butter from the top floor?
'cos he wanted to see the butterfly
srry had to sneak that in...lol..continuin alon the same lines
A SARDAR comes running to the doctor shouting and Screaming in pain "
Please doctor, you've got to help me. I've been stung by a bee."
DOCTOR: " Don't worry; I'll put some cream on it."
SARDAR: " You will never find that bee. It must be miles away by now."
DOCTOR: " No, you don't understand! I'll put some Cream on the place you were stung."
SARDAR: " Oh! It happened in the garden where I was Sitting under a tree."'
DOCTOR (in anger): " No, no, you IDIOT! I mean on which part of your body did that bee sting."
SARDAR (still screaming in pain): " On my finger! The bee stung me on my finger and it really hurts."
DOCTOR (banging his fist, abusing and shouting):" Which one?"
SARDAR (innocently): " How am I to know? All bees look the same to me.
Q) Which is the only word in english with 4 Ts and 1 G ???
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
Ans: Originality (Oru G, Naal T)
Thats mallu for uall
/// if u didnt get it.. good!
what is the opposite of nagpanchami?
ans: nag did not punch me
what is the inverse of nagpanchami?
ans: i punched the nag
This ones GOOD >>>
Q: when papa elephant died, he was buried under the orange tree, why?
A: 'cos he loved oranges
Q: when mama elephant died, she was buried under the orange tree, why?
A: 'cos she loved papa elephant
Q: when brother elephant died, he was also buried under the orange
tree, why?
A: 'cos it was a family tradition
Q: when sister elephent died, she wasn't buried under the orange tree,
why?
A: how many elephants can you bury under an orange tree, huh?
And then Again....
he the genie said,
'OK. You released me from the lamp, blah, blah, blah. This is the
fourth time this month and I'm getting a little sick of these wishes,
so you can forget about three. You only get one wish.'
The man sat and thought about it for a while and said,
'I've always wanted to go to Hawaii but I'm scared to fly and I get very seasick. Could you build me a bridge to Hawaii so I can drive over there to visit?'
The genie laughed and said, 'That's impossible. Think of the logistics
of that! How would the supports ever reach the bottom of the Pacific?
Think of how much concrete... how much steel! No, think of another wish.'
The man said OK and tried to think of a really good wish. Finally, he
said,
'I've been married and divorced four times. My wives always said that I
don't care and that I'm insensitive. So, I wish that I could understand
women... know how they feel inside and what they're thinking when they
give me the silent treatment... know why they're crying, know what they
really want when they say "nothing"... know how to make them truly
happy. .'
The genie said,
'You want that bridge two lanes or four?'
sardar to girl:i love you
girl to sardar:im sorry im a lesbian!
sardar :but wats a "lesbian"
girl:it means i love to have sex only with girls!
sardar: oh even im a lesbian!
And finally
All men are created equal, even superman has to wear his pants one leg at a time...
But then some are more equal than others, superman wears his briefs
over his pants and still manages to look cool ...doesnt mean u can pull
sumtin like that off so....
cheers yall..... I ll be back for all u Pro-lifers hu didnt get that connection between Rajni and drugs....even better so.. watch put for the positive LSD story comin soon... Over and out
(Note :All views expressed here are probably udaod....
.... Q1)"Ananth are you high?" ..ur guess is as good as mine..
Q2)"Menon are you serious ...or jus satire" Ans: jus Satire)
Archives on the blog if u don know the link ...u probably shudnt read
it..mail me)
GOD Bless Amayeerikya..happy independence day in advance
posted by Mystic Yogi @ 9:50 AM
0 Comments:
Post a Comment
Subscribe to Post Comments [Atom]
<< Home